Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
