How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
