Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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