you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
The cops high fived after they tackled you
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
