i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize