"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
