next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
The best revenge is premature balding
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
