38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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