I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
