I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I currently don't understand fingers.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
