My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize
