I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
