The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
