he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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