They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Someone signed my nipple.
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