He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I can't turn off my feet"
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
