Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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