imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just want to make out with him forever
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
