There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize