i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
