But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
