I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
