you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize