He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
