Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
