Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
