yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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