So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
