This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
