im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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