Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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