then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
