If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
