i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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