fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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