I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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