I am in a vortex of obligation.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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