Don't you send me to vm
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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