I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
