I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
two words...techno handjob
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
