playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
don't judge my taste in strippers
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
