I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
