at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
