I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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