I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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