I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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