My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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