is your mom at the bar?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
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