the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Let's get the cat blown out
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
