wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize